Four Poems
To Satchel
Paige
(1906—1982)
Dear Mr. Paige,
(1906—1982)
Dear Mr. Paige,
the only regret I have
about
being born
when I was
is that I
didn’t get to see you pitch
in
a live game;
to see you
throw
your Jump Ball,
be
ball,
two-hump blooper,
Midnight
Creeper,
Bat Dodger,
or
hesitation pitch,
I would
have loved to hear
you tell Jackie Robinson
and the
rest
of your infielders
and
outfielders
to sit down
while you
struck out the side.
I would have loved to see
I would have loved to see
you
intentionally walk
two
batters
in the 1942 Negro League
World Series,
so you
could face
the great Josh Gibson
with the
bases loaded
and tell him
where
each pitch
was going to go
before
you struck
him out
on three straight
pitches.
It would
have been beautiful
to watch you help
Cleveland
win
the 1948
World Series,
months
after
my
mother was born—
with other
pitches,
such as a
screwball,
knuckleball,
and the
Eephus pitch;
my jaw dropping
like a
drawbridge;
people
embracing
in the Terminal Tower,
and every
single fountain
in
Kansas City
gurgling your name.
#
To Dave
Kingman
Dear Mr. Kingman:
Dear Mr. Kingman:
was it fun
handing out chrome
fountain
pens
to New
York-based sports reporters
on your
first day
of Spring
Training?
This is on my mind
when I see
a small
envelope
from a
stranger
in Texas.
I open it:
your
baseball card
from 1975
has arrived,
like
summer. It’s in
better
shape than I thought:
sharp corners, no creases
sharp corners, no creases
or scuffs.
Then I notice
an
expression of resignation
on your face,
on your face,
as if
posing for the picture
was
necessary for you
to get on
with your workday,
and my
spirits sink
on your
behalf,
like car
keys hurled
into an
ocean. Why
do I feel
so connected
to someone
I’ve never met?
How is it that being a fan
How is it that being a fan
of yours:
of admiring
all of the
moonshots
you
launched in your career,
77 of them
at the time this card was made
at the time this card was made
and
distributed,
can have
such an affect
on me? I
mean,
would you
feel empathy
for me if
I got a rejection letter
from The
New Yorker?
Maybe it’s
because I was raised
with tough
love:
to hide my feelings
to hide my feelings
so that no
one would use them
to hurt
me, like the press did to you
when you
didn’t have a good game.
Maybe it’s
because I saw the pain
in your
eyes when you struck out
when I
watched you on TV
when I was
a child
in my
parent’s house
when this
card first came out,
when your
image
was as
constant of a presence
in my
family’s living room
at least
as much as any adult’s,
Seeing you
demonstrate your talents
to perform
superhuman feats:
making
legendary home runs
with your
bat
might have
caused some to forget
that no
one can be at their best
every
single moment
of their
work or personal lives.
As a
friend of mine told me,
even
computers
need down
time.
As you
told a reporter,
Everyone is hot and cold, I guess.
Perhaps
it’s also to do with sharing—
watching
ballgames with my father
and the
rest of the men of my family,
with their
swagger, Italian style:
their
unbuttoned polyester shirts
exposing
their hairy chests,
chains,
charms, and crosses,
sinking
whiskey, spritzers, and beer,
having
smokes, telling dirty jokes,
and
swapping ballplayer stories
gave me a
sense of belonging,
of being
able to listen,
and
converse with adults
in a
common language
and
horsehide vernacular.
Recalling
days of yours
and my
father’s prime,
when you
were both at your strongest,
most
vibrant, and visible,
comforts
me
in these
uncertain days
which has
exposed
how
vulnerable
all of us
are
and always
have been.
Although I
don’t know exactly
how it
felt
to be a
young adult in 1975,
I feel for
you and my father—
his focus
on raising me
to be a person
of steely resolve,
your focus
on trying
to do your
job, to perform
like a
hard-nosed actor
on the
field, yet protect
your
privacy off of it,
your
sensitivity as powerful
as your
swing,
as you try
to get a hold of one
in the San
Francisco cold,
The Golden
Gate Bridge
gripped in
mist.
#
To Dwight
Evans
Mr. Evans, I was raised to hate
Mr. Evans, I was raised to hate
all things
Boston, especially
the Red
Sox, by my father,
even
though I had cousins
on my
mother’s side of my family,
the more
direct European part
of my
Italian American lineage,
who lived
in Beantown’s North End
and in
Back Bay.
Had my eyebrows not been incinerated
Had my eyebrows not been incinerated
by my
father’s petrol glare
when I
said Wow, after
watching
you throw: when you gunned down
Sweet Lou
Piniella at the dish
from
Yankee Stadium’s right field;
had my
mother’s parents not been estranged
from their
Boston family members;
had I
grown up there or anywhere
in New
England
instead of
New York,
I would
have cheered for you
louder,
and more often.
I would have been a Red Sox fan.
I would have worn 24,
I would have been a Red Sox fan.
I would have worn 24,
your
number, in my little league years
if my
uniforms ever had them,
imagining
myself at Fenway,
sharing
the outfield with Fred Lynn and Jim Rice;
sharing franks and beers with friends and family
sharing franks and beers with friends and family
who I never
had a problem with;
who were
okay with teaching me
how to say
Yankees suck
or I love
you in authentic Italian
then
chanting your nickname: Dewey, Dewey,
a dashing
moustache of jet-black hope
growing on my fanatic face.
#
To Ted
Simmons
Dear Mr. Simmons: Simba,
Dear Mr. Simmons: Simba,
my
grandfather never visited
St. Louis,
Milwaukee, or
Atlanta,
but that didn’t stop him
from
appreciating your gritty game
behind the
plate and at bat
for the
Cardinals, Brewers,
and
Braves. He said
you were
tougher than any bus
or Sherman
Tank he drove
in
civilian life and in World War Two,
and that you
gunned down baserunners
as if they
slept with your wife, even when
your knees
felt like dinosaurs, pelted
and
overcome by meteorites: their sky
ablaze, like crashed warplanes.
# # #
Joey Nicoletti was born in New York City. He works in Buffalo.